Thank you everyone for your prayers and thoughtful comments on my previous post. It so warmed my heart and reminded me of God's love and care. I'm really struggling while I'm in this time period but I know God is working behind the scenes. And I just need to wait on Him to show me what to do and what decisions to make. There are Bible verses that talk about waiting on the Lord and I never really understood them, until it was explained to me what it meant to "wait" on the Lord. It's not a passive, hanging around until He does something. It's waiting - kind of like how a restaurant server waits upon customers - responding to and fulfilling their requests. We are to wait, as in serve, upon the Lord. So I'm desperately trying to do that right now. I'm not always very successful. I definitely don't always have the right attitude. And peace is mostly still eluding me. But I'm going to keep trying. Because I know that at just the right time, God will make His path for me known.
For several years I've loved the song "While I'm Waiting" by John Waller. I find it no small coincidence that last evening, while I was really struggling with panic and depression, as we were channel surfing, we passed the movie "Fireproof" literally just as this beautiful song was beginning to play. Jim stopped and let it play out for me so I could be ministered by it. And the tears flowed. I know many of you are experiencing tough times now. Just last week, Tina, of "Bringing Along OCD" expressed similar struggles with waiting for things to happen. I'm hoping this might speak to her and to you too.
But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint. Isaiah 40:31 KJV