Why "71º & Sunny?"

I consider 71º to be the perfect temperature. Not too cold and not too hot. I also love perfect sunny days. The vast majority of days are not 71º & Sunny and yet, all days were created by God's hand and they are still gifts, even if they don't fit my ridiculous definition of perfection. My struggle with OCD has at times imprisoned me in an impossible attempt to achieve perfection. I'm now learning to love all kinds of days that don't even come close to 71º & Sunny.

Please leave me a comment below. I really want to know what you are thinking!

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Relapse-ish?

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to all of you who commented on my previous post and offered your support and prayers. You all hold such a special place in my heart that I could never fully express it.

I thought I would give you a quick update. I went to see my psychologist on Tuesday, and she surprisingly told me that I was not having a relapse. She considers it to be a relapse if a patient goes back to square one. I'm happy to report that I am nowhere near that.

She helped me think through my circumstances and helped me to see that yes, though I am struggling right now, and I FEEL horrible, I am not regressing all the way to the beginning. The truth is that I don't think I could, even if I tried, as I know way too much about fighting anxiety now. I can't unlearn it. Thankfully! My doctor also helped me to remember that I am experiencing transition in my life and transitions take time and they cannot be rushed, no matter how much we try.

So there you go. I was letting my emotions confuse the issue. Again. Well, that's a big surprise, isn't it? Ah, no. Not really. I'm so grateful that she helped me to clear up some cognitive distortions and to reframe the situation. In addition, the session was a good reminder to attempt mindfulness in all areas of my life.

My circumstances have improved over this last week, and I feel like I'm turning a corner. I believe this is in large part due to your prayers, to the prayers of my family, and my "in-person" friends. Thank you so much my dear, sweet friends.

I'm choosing to view this as another opportunity for God to grow me, humble me, and refine me. Sometimes though, I really wish I was not such a slow learner, ha!

12 comments:

  1. Awwww.....slow learner or not, Monique, you are a treasure to God and to myself and I am certain to many others as well. I am so glad to hear this, that it is kind of like one, or a few steps back and not the entire yard. I am keeping you in my prayers and again sending you much love and many hugs. God bless you.

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    1. Thank you, Linda. You never fail to make me feel cared for.

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  2. That is wonderful news! I agree with Linda, you are a treasure to God and to myself.

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  3. Monique, I am so glad things are getting better!! I wanted to comment on your last post that there's a big difference between a relapse and a set back, even many set backs. It's important to distinguish between the two. I'm so happy to see that you are feeling better and circumstances have changed. Much love from me and sending a prayer for you
    Xoxo, C

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    1. Oh yes, C, I am learning that there is indeed a difference.In retrospect (gulp) I'm kind of happy this happened. I'm learning so much through this that will carry me forward. Hugs to you too.

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    1. Oh Elizabeth - it's so great to hear from you again, friend! Hugs back to you. I hope you are well.

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  5. I'm glad you are turning the corner. Even after reading your last post, I didn't believe you were back at square one. I think it's difficult sometimes to not think the worst when we go through a bad time. We all have lessons to learn. Sometimes I get discouraged and think I should have made it further by now. But all in due time, right? We have to find meaning in the process. Continuing to pray for you. :-)

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    1. Yes, yes, YES - meaning in the process. Because I believe there really IS meaning in the process. Thanks for the prayers, Tina.

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  6. It often seems worse than it really is when we stumble...really it just means we're HUMAN. Praying for you! Hugs.

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