|No thanks, I'm good without it.|
Tonight I felt really . . . happy. For no special reason. And that is awesome. The last few months have been a bit difficult, both with anxiety and depression. Lately, they've been weaving in and out of my mind a bit more often. So it felt great to not feel the weight of either of them this evening.
Before he left work this afternoon, Jim texted me and asked if I would like to go out to dinner. He figured that since we had a pretty busy week coming up that we wouldn't have much alone time together, so he thought a dinner out would be nice. Nothing fancy, just a local Chinese restaurant that we really like. We went and enjoyed both our time together and the excellent meal. I thought it was pretty funny when I opened up my fortune cookie and found a note that said, "You will soon achieve perfection." In the past I would have read that longingly and wished it to be true. Now, I just laugh at statements like that. I don't want or need perfection anymore. Not that it even exists anyway.
|What is that round protuberance|
coming out of my stomach?
When we got home, my kitty, Anna, and I played with a ball on my bed. It felt like total carefree freedom. In the past, I would have felt like my bed was dirty, or that I was dirty, and that I couldn't just roll around on my bed and play with my cat. And that's when it hit me. I was happy. Happy to just be. Happy to hang out with my cat and not worry about contamination. Happy to leave perfection and all of its burden behind.